Dirty Mushroom

Tonight I found myself overwhelmed with dinner and I was only "making" a frozen pizza and a salad. Seriously. It's been a long day and I'm still recovering from my birthday tom-foolery. Jordan was out (rushing to file our taxes!) so Frank was in the chair feasting while I chopped veggies for the Digiorno. There were plenty of mushrooms to go around, so I sauteed a few for Frank and kept on with my "cooking". My lack of 100% attention enraged him and he windmilled his tray, sending peas, carrots, cucumbers and mushrooms all over. I count on Stella to eat the mess.
Jordan sashayed in moments later and sat across from Frank while I finished dinner. We talked (he talked and I mostly thought about how half-assed I do things nowadays) and then I started to clean up.
I snatched a bowl from the table and ate a few leftover mushrooms...as they were going down something felt gritty. I whipped around to see wide-eyed Jordan, about to tell me those mushrooms had been on the floor.
Awesome.
Could they have been in Frank's mouth? Stella's mouth? When did I last Swiffer? Where had Jordan's hands been before he picked them up?
Answers I will never know.
I'm hoping Corona has antiseptic qualities.
I keep telling Jordan he can laugh now, but he hasn't cracked...yet.

Birthday Month

It's April and it's all mine! I'm the opposite of people who keep their birthday a secret - I shout it from the rooftops! I gave my co-workers a few weeks notice and my friends and family already know I'm going to want to party. I had an amazing trip to Spain, chock full of celebratory drinks, and am ready to rage on Saturday.
The big 30 this year. I can't say it won't happen, but I'm really not feeling sad or depressed about this milestone. I'm proud of how much I've packed in 30 short years and happy with where I'm at. Plenty of room to grow, but I'm good to stay just like this for now!
Birthday wishes? A hot pair of glitter sandals I saw at Payless and a juicy pork chop. Fingers crossed!

Adios twenties! 30 is the new 18.